Tuesday, June 26, 2007

As The Pool Drains

When I was growing up, we lived across the street from the neighborhood swimming pool. My brother and sisters and I basically lived there during the summer. We were all on the swim team and I paid my way through high school by working in the concession stand and later as a lifeguard. Yep, at one time I had a semi Bikini Body, a heck of a tan, and could twirl a whistle like a pro. I don’t know why I wasn’t auditioned for Bay Watch.

Oh. Yes I do. Something about that “semi” part. Never mind.

But hey, I could have saved a life if I needed to.

There always seemed to be one drama or another going on, as tends to happen when you get a bunch of teens together. Jack had finally asked Jill out. Mary was trying to break up Tarzan and Jane so she could have him all to herself. Did you see the swimsuit Brenda wore? Bonnie was seen with Clyde back behind the tennis courts. AND, Sylvester asked Tweetie to play miniature golf. Scandalous!

We always joked we could write our own soap opera and call it “As the Pool Drains.”

I was reminded of this last week as I was trying to catch up on all my blogs from while I had been away. Then I thought again how nice it would be if someone would do a summary like you might see in TV Guide. Maybe they do it in Soap Opera Digest, too, but I don’t know. It might go something like this:

“Last week on As the Blog Rolls: MattG is breaking coffee carafes and telling bad jokes because he is no longer seeing blood spatter. LawDog is mumbling Gregorian chants while looking for his Muse. Mair has been watching movies with Fred and gives him a thumbs up. DragonWatch is on to the big oil companies and thinks they’re in cahoots with Rednecks. Holly is on pins and needles—oops, Holly has pins in her hand and wants a needle of Versed. Lovi is on hiatus because of her J-O-B. Kate receives continuing education units for sobering thoughts. Phlegm gets a ^5 for her Michael Moore comments and needs to give Ambulance Driver her beach towel. AD is once again writing in the nude and is in love with BabsRN, who wrote his theme song:

Come ‘n list’n to my story ‘bout a medic named AD,
Who could tell ya all about pathophysiology.

And then one day he was startin’ an IV,
When off to his left he could see his enemy.

Sumdood, that is…

Slimeball…

Drinkin’ Two Beers.”

Shall we see who can come up with the best second verse? And any other suggestions for the name of our little soap opera here in the blogosphere?

Flo

9 comments:

HollyB said...

That's GOOD!

Kate said...

LOL! Wonderful!

Ambulance Driver said...

Damn, a singer AND a lyricist! You are a true renaissance woman, Flo. ;)

Anonymous said...

ROFLMBO! You really can be funny!

Lovi said...

Ok here goes my feeble attempt at the second verse - keeping in mind I've only been up an hour and had only 6 cups of coffee:

"So they gathered up their notes and typed without a care,
Sometimes they're happy and sometimes like a bear.
Well they type and they type,
without the fanfare
Like a writer on a mission
who'd just been told a dare!

Internet that is...

Blogsville...."


My personal vote for the name of your new drama would be simply "Backspace".

There you have it....my contribution to society for the day.
Now I have to go and get some asprin. This was too much this early in the morning

HollyB said...

Lainy, that's quite Clever.
"Backspace" I like it.

Anonymous said...

Not me Holly. Lovi win's this one. What a talent so early in the morning!

DW said...

Good GAWD, I have blown a seam!!!!
Thanks for noticing!!!

phlegmfatale said...

Absolutely brilliant!!!

The first chapter, the second, AND the name Backspace. LOVE it.

All that AND I get to go off on a foaming-at-the-mouth-rant about Michael Moore, officially the record? Could it get any sweeter? I think not.